Mindfulness

I’m learning about mindfulness. I’ve taken a workshop with Padraig O’Morain and I’ve begun an online course. Mindfulness means being aware of what you are doing while you are doing it. This is not as simple as it seems. Often I find I am doing things on some sort of auto-pilot whilst my head is somewhere else, usually worrying about something or other. Then I come out of where my mind had taken me and emerge into the present moment, startled and blinking.

This is completely normal. Our minds constantly impel us to think about the past or the future, rather than being in the here and now, paying attention to what is actually going on with us and around us. Mindfulness is all about learning how to be in and remain in the present moment. Although mindfulness is a practice that is derived from Buddhism, it is not the same as this ancient religion.

During the workshop I sat with my eyes closed with around fifty other people and focused on my breathing for a few minutes. This sounds easy but it was very hard to stay focused on my breathing, my mind kept drifting away to other things. When this happens, Padraig advised, you notice the thought you are having and gently bring yourself back to your breathing. Don’t scold yourself for having odd thoughts or ruminating, he said, this is entirely normal. Just accept that fact and bring your attention back to your breathing.

Later we did some more exercises, including a body scan: a process of paying attention to each part of your body, starting at your toes and finishing with your head. Inbetween the exercises we learnt about the health benefits of mindfulness. These have been particularly marked for people suffering stress, both mental and physical. And mindfulness is now accepted as a therapy by the medical establishment for people suffering from chronic pain, depression and anxiety. As I have suffered from each of these at times over the past decade, I felt that mindfulness was something that I should try. 

The logic of mindfulness is that by noticing the often stressed thoughts that you have about the past and future, as well as the physical effects they produce (raised pulse, impact of stress hormones etc), you are able to recognise that these thoughts and their effects are in fact detached from your actual here and now. Through doing this regularly you become more skilled at remaining in your actual present, you ruminate less and you become calmer. As you spend less time and energy in reaction to a remembered painful past or an imagined painful future, you have more ability to make better choices about what is actually happening to you.

A while ago I got a postcard, out of the blue, from a good friend. The card had just two words emblazoned on it: enjoy now. As a longstanding cancer patient (I am just coming up to my five years anniversary) who has had a recurrence and is at high risk of another, there are plenty of painful past events to recall and some painful futures that are all too easy to imagine. One day at a time has been my mantra since my recurrence last year. But a day is a long time and a night is often longer. Perhaps that should really be one moment at a time. For all we ever have is the present moment. The past has gone and the future is unknown. So let's do our best to mindfully enjoy the here and now.